this one is better~Quote:
Originally Posted by p0lar_bear
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this one is better~Quote:
Originally Posted by p0lar_bear
lol, best quote hereQuote:
Originally Posted by p0lar_bear
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: you kjnow what would be hilarious
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: to show n00bs
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: what an example
p0lar_bear: seriously, been about two years since my last eye exam :(
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: of and unfunny convo would be
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: to post
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: like
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: i'll say
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: you smell like shit
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: and you'll go
p0lar_bear: much like you're posting
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: "how can you smell me, we're on the internet you doodle brain"
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: we'll laugh viciously
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: and post it
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: cause where just so awesome like
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: And totally not missing the point of the thread at all
p0lar_bear: HOW TO MAKE A QUOTES THREAD POST:
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: Are you with me
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: HA HA HA
p0lar_bear: step 1: say something
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: HAR HAR HAR
p0lar_bear: step 2: spam chat with "LOLOLOLOLOLOL"
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: LOLOL!O!OL!!Ol
p0lar_bear: step 3: sayd "Quotes thread'd"
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: Quoting diz cause i'm down
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: This is perfection
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: can you imagine the amount of rep we'll get for this
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: we'll get like
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: 10
p0lar_bear: step 4: <strike>shit</strike>post it on modacity
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: should be awesomwe
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: YOU DOWN G
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: THIS IS GUNNA BE HILARIOUS
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: LETS DO THIS
p0lar_bear: WORD
p0lar_bear: YEAH MAN
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: Quote'd
p0lar_bear: QUOTES THREAD FAME HERE WE COME WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOzzzzzzzzzz
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: (your supposed to go, you son of a bitch you whenrt sposed to quote it
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: that makes it more funny)
p0lar_bear: oh
p0lar_bear: fag
p0lar_bear: stop quoting me
p0lar_bear: asshoel
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: har har har
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: Suck it
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: N000000000000B
p0lar_bear: (-in8r)
p0lar_bear: oh
p0lar_bear: we forgot the mem reference
p0lar_bear: uhhh
p0lar_bear: uhhh
p0lar_bear: mudkips!
p0lar_bear: LOO>LOLOLOLOLOKOOIJOIHFJilyAG:OUIYFGP(AYR(P@YRKHJD BAF
Lelldorallen, Wildantor archer: DERP.
Meta humor in the quotes thread. This thread has reached a new level of unfunny.
the thread is parodying itself.
also, must rep.
Since i only have a screenshot and no logs of this convo i guess this should do.
Not too sure how many here even remember conure.
http://i50.tinypic.com/2wm2t6a.jpg
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: you know what it was
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: timo's cache got fucked up
[03:05] iMod53: heh
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: goddamn
[03:05] iMod53: ah, those crazy kiwis
[03:05] iMod53: them and their dirty, dirty caches
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: shit was so cache
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: heh
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: heh
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: ...HEH
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
[03:05] P0lar_Bear: :suicide:
[03:06] iMod53: ...HEH
[03:06] iMod53: MORE LIKE
[03:06] iMod53: his cache was so shit
[03:06] P0lar_Bear: oh
[03:06] P0lar_Bear: oh shit
[03:06] P0lar_Bear: :iceburn:
Maybe this should be in community or the quotes thread, but I thought one thread specifically for funny anecdotes and punnage would be ok.
An old Scot and a young Scot were sitting in the pub talking. The old man says to the young man; "Son, look out the window. You see that stone fence stretchin' out 'cross the moor as far as yer eye can see? Well I built that fence with me own two hands. But, do they call me MacGregor the fence builder? Nooooo."
"Now ya take a look up at the bar. See the perfectly constructed thing of beauty stretchin' across this great hall? Well, I built that bar with me own two hands. But, do they call me MacGregor the bar builder? Noooo."
"Now take a look toward the sea. Do you see that magnificent pier, sturdy and straight, unmoving againt the sea and all her wrath? Well, I built that pier with me own two hands. But, do they call me MacGregor the pier builder? Noooo."
Then MacGregor leans in close to the young man and whispers....
"But ya fuck one goat..."
A blind man walks into a bar and orders a pint. While the bartender is pouring it he says, "Want to hear a joke?" and she says, "OK."
He starts: "So there's this blonde..."
"Okay, hold on" says the bartender. "I can see you're blind so I'm gonna do you a favour here. Just so you know, I'm a blonde. The manager is a blonde. The bouncer is a blonde, and there's a good friend of mine by the window there, she's a black belt in karate, she's a blonde too. There's a couple of biker chicks at a table nearby, both blondes.
"So, you just have a think about that and ask yourself: do you really want to tell that joke?"
She gives him his drink. "Well, uh, I guess not," he says. "I don't wanna have to explain it six times."
This guy is sitting at a bar, drinking is beer. Another man enters the bar and sits right next to him. The guy orders a beer then proceeds to take out this tiny man and a tiny piano from his bag. He sits him on the counter and the tiny man starts playing his piano.
The other guy goes:
"What the hell? Where did you get this little guy?"
"Oh, I got him from the genie in the men's bathroom."
So the other guy rushes to the bathroom and sure enough, there is the genie.
The genie says: "Hi, I can grant you only one wish!"
"That's fine" he replies, "I wish for a million bucks."
So the genie spawns a million ducks. The guy is confused. He goes back to the other guy and tells him:
"Dude, I think your genie is a little bit deaf, I asked him for a million bucks and got a million ducks.."
"Yeah, did you really think I wished for a 12 inch pianist?"
A guy walks into a bar on the Space Needle. There's a dude at the bar he sits next to who says that, when the wind is just right, you can jump off the balcony and you'll be swept right back up. The first guy doesn't believe him, so they go out on the balcony and the second guy jumps off, falls a few feet and then WHOOSH ends up back on the balcony. The second guy thinks this looks amazing, and when the first guy says "ok, go!" he jumps off, and plummets to his death.
The first guy comes back inside and the bartender says, "You're a real douchebag when you're drunk, superman."
After a massive night on the grog with Snow White, the Seven Dwarfs are walking around their local village to the different churches, rather hungover, but desperately trying to find a nun.
At the first church, Grumpy demands to know if there are any nuns in the church. The priest says “no, there are no nuns here”. All the time the 6 other Dwarfs are dying with behind grumpy.
Grumpy moves on to the other church in the village, only to find the same answer; there are no nuns there either. The other Dwarfs are gasping for air, all doubled over laughing.
Grumpy is infuriated and moves down the street to the last church.
He comes to the door, with the other 6 Dwarfs slowly following behind him, pushing one another along with laughter. But alas, there were no nuns at the last church. Grumpy storms out of the church, while his 6 Dwarfs chant with hilarity…
“Grumpy fucked a penguin! Grumpy fucked a Penguin!”
This guy sits at a bar, shaking his head in disbelief, watching this other guy who keeps disappearing into the back room with girl after girl after girl...
Finally, he gets up the nerve to ask the other guy: "Hey man, what's your secret?"
The other guy says: "Watch and learn."
Girl walks by, guy says: "Hey. Tickle your ass with a feather."
Girl says: "What?!"
Guy smiles and says: "I said 'It's particularly nasty weather.' Jeez. What'd you think I said?"
Girls storms off angrily.
Another girl walks by.
Guy says: "Tickle your ass with a feather."
Girl says: "Hah. WTF? Why not? Let's go!"
The two disappear for a few minutes into the back room.
The lonely guy can't believe his eyes. He thanks his teacher when he returns, and proceeds to drink for the next few hours, hoping to gain enough liquid courage to close the deal... Finally, the time arrives...
Girls walks by.
Guy says: "Hey! Hey you!"
Girl's like: "What?!?"
Guy says: "Stick a feather up your ass!"
Girl says: "WHAT?!!"
Guy says: "It's fucking raining!"
A guy walks into a bar, and order 5 shots. Bartender says, "Jeez, you look like you just got some bad news." Guy says, "Yea, just found out my dads gay and he's leaving my mom." So the guy downs the 5 shots and drinks the rest of the night.
The next day he comes back, and orders 5 shots again. Bartender says, "What happened now?" Guy says, "Just found out my brother's gay and he's leaving his wife." So the guy downs the 5 shots again, and drinks until closing time.
The next day he comes back again, and orders 5 more shots. Bartender says, "Jesus, doesn't anybody in your family like women?" Guy says, "Yea, my wife".
George was planning on going out with "The Boys" when his wife told him that he wasn't leaving the house. His wife said, "The last time you went out with your friends you got so drunk that you puked on your shirt." George told his wife, "But Honey, I promise that I wont drink a drop of alcohol all night!" So after begging his old lady for an hour, George got the OK the go out with the guys as long as he stayed off of the booze. George met up with the guys at a local bar and proceeded to get shit-faced. After about 3 hours of guzzling liquor, George blew chow all over his shirt. George yelled, "Shit! The old lady is going to throw my ass out of the house for getting drunk and puking on my new shirt!" Bill, George's best pal, gave drunk ass George an idea of how to keep from getting in trouble with the wife. Bill told him, "All you got to do is have a $20 bill in your hand when you walk through the door. Then, when she accuses you of barfing all over yourself, just tell her that some other drunk puked on you and that he gave you 20 bucks to get the shirt cleaned." So, when George walked into the house with money in hand, his wife was waiting for him in the living room. She yelled, "I knew that your drunk ass would spew bile and booze all over that new shirt!" George responded, "Honey, let me explain! This drunken fool at the bar puked on me and gave me 20 bucks to have it cleaned." His wife snatched the money out of his hand and observed that he was holding two $20 bills. George's wife asked, "Is that so? Then where did the other 20 dollar bill come from?" George then said, "Oh, That's from the guy who shit in my pants."
A guy walks into a bar, and carries with him a small octopus. He sets him on the bar and orders a drink. It just so happens that this is the bar where the Boston Symphony musicians like to hang out after their performances, and indeed they're all there tonight.
The flautist finally lets curiosity get the better of him, so he goes up to the guy and asks, "What's the deal with your octopus?" The man replies, "I'll bet you 50$ that he can play any of your instruments just as well as you!"
The flautist starts laughing and thinks this is an easy way to get 50$. He goes back to his seat, grabs his flute and brings it back to the octopus. Sure enough, the octopus takes the flute from him, puts the mouthpiece to his beak and starts playing a beautiful tune. The flautist is stunned, and returns to his seat 50$ poorer.
Seeing this amazing spectacle, the violinist thinks to himself, "The octopus doesn't even have a chin! There's no way he can play MY instrument!" He goes up to the man at the bar and says as much to him. The man replies, "The bet's the same; 50$ says he can play your violin just fine!" The violinist grabs his instrument and hands it to the octopus. He immediately starts playing a very moving piece. The violinist can't believe it, and he returns to his seat, 50$ poorer.
The bagpiper sees this happen, and thinks to himself, "There's NO WAY that octopus can play my bagpipes. I'm going to be the first one to get 50$ off this guy!" So he walks up to the octopus and hands him the bagpipes. The octopus looks at them, turns them over, pokes at them, but makes no move to play them. The man says to the octopus, "What do you think you're doing? Play the damned thing already!" The octopus looks at him and says, "Play it? As soon as I figure out how to get it's pajamas off, I'm gonna fuck it!"
Sorry to mods/admins if this is considered a shit thread/post.
Jokes Funny Random? Eh, couldn't hurt. NSFW to start up:
How does a daughter know when her mother's on her period?
