Yeah, I wasn't quite sure what to do with the "buh". She was just so surprised at that she uttered an involuntary sound, but if I actually write that in so many words it interrupts her speech. Suggestions?


So you thought the first one was too long? Interesting. I actually feel the opposite way about it, I felt like it was over too quickly. Do you feel like some of the dialogue is repetitive? because I do get that feeling when I re-read it.